Tuesday, January 8, 2013

The Bachelor, Ep. 17.1

Season 17: Sean!

I'm so excited for this season. But, I'm so worried that Sean won't be the sweet, adorable, amazing guy that he was on Emily's season. It's happened to Jason, to Jake and to Ben. We'll see what happens!

First of all, I would like to thank ABC for the abundance of shirtless Sean shots (say that 3x fast!) in the first few minutes. I will expect more of that this season...thanks in advance!

Of course in the opening we have to see an old "friend" come and give advice. I really could not care less what Arie has to say. The best thing to come out of his visit was Sean trying to come up with the best way to say "will you accept this rose?" and even better...how to let the girls down. Sean said he can't use the "it's not you, it's me"...because "it IS going to be them!! Haha! I also loved his break-up speech to Arie...that was great! I could have done without Arie's kissing lesson. I can't speak from experience (obviously), but I think Sean does alright for himself. But thank goodness Sean says he doesn't think he could use any of his advice. Wise words from Sean so far.

It's time to meet some of the girls. I've read the spoilers and know the final 4 girls and also who Sean chooses, so it's kind of hard to want to learn anything about the other girls. Here are my first impressions:

Desiree--wedding dress girl
Tierra--super excited that Sean is the Bachelor...so her dog can have a daddy...ok...
Robyn--Spanish sticky notes everywhere! She's weird!
Diana--2 cute little girls.
Sarah--Born with one arm.
Ashley--She has no idea why she's single...it's just her and her cat + Christian Grey. And, she wants Sean to rip her clothes off and spank her. Yep, she's out.
Lesley--From D.C. and is campaigning for Sean's heart.
Kristy--She is a model who always wants the spotlight...girls will be jealous. And...she's out.
AshLee--She's an obsessive organizer...she talks like she's really depressed.

Limo time!
First one out is AshLee. We don'y really learn anything different than what we saw in the video.
Jackie--She gives him a big 'ol red lipstick kiss on the cheek.
Selma--She whips out a napkin from her...um...dress to wipe the lipstick off.
Leslie H--Her mouth is huge (sorry!)! She says "holy Toledo" and calls him Mr. McSteamy.
Daniella--She forces him to do a ridiculous handshake...she seems a little bossy.
Kelly--She wrote him a song...usually a train wreck but hers was actually really catchy and ahe doesn't have a bad voice.
Katie--She teaches him a yoga move...just the arms.
Ashley P--She pulls a tie out of her...um...dress. And even though she said "Fifty Shades of Grey" he was clueless.
Taryn--She forgot to tell her name and also hasn't watched The Bachelor.
Catherine--We learn absolutely nothing about her and she seems kind of annoying. The way she talks is kind of abrassive.
Robyn--In her long dress, tries to do 2 back walk-overs...she does 1 and totally screws up the 2nd one and falls over. Then, I'm pretty sure that through her embarassing walk of shame she failed to tell him her name. Yes, we have a real winner here.
Lacey--She brought a heart of lace for him so he doesn't forget her "Lacey" is her nickname.
Paige--on Bachelor Pad 3 as one of the fans.
Tierra--Again...she's so glad it's him! She has a heart on her hand...it's open and she wants him to be the one to complete it. Sean walks away and comes back with the first first impression rose (yes, you read that right). Cue jealous girls...NOW!
Amanda--She wanted to get the awkwardness out of the way, so they just stared at each other...awkward!
KeriAnn--She drove 2775 miles to meet him.
Desiree--She brought pennies to make a wish in the fountain with him. He thought she was cute.
Sarah--She said this is exactly how she imagined falling in love.
Brooke--What a creeper! I did not get a good vibe from her at all! She's black, wearing a black dress. Her hair is a weird shade of red and she's wearing bright pink lipstick. That has disaster written all over it! Then she pulls him close and makes some sort of weird cat purr/growl in his ear. And...another one bites the dust. They are just making it way too easy on him.
Diana--She says he looks like Ken.
Lesley--She wants him to hike the football to him, obviously just wants to look at his butt...not a bad move!
Kristy--"The best from the midwest"...we'll see.
Ashley H--"Hi Ken, I'm Barbie"...really original. I think I've heard that one already. She's just strange. I hate the way she talks like someone on the receiving end of an 800 #.
Lauren--Her family owns an Italian restaurant, and she has a message from her dad: break her heart and he'll break his legs.
Lindsay--"Girl in the wedding dress"...she kissed him on the lips before even giving her name. Luckily, being a jokester himself, he enjoyed it and thought it was funny.
Last girl is none other than Kacie B from Ben's season. I've always liked her and I think they would be really good together.

One-on-one time:
Desiree gets first impression rose #2. AshLee got #3. Selma gets rose #4. Robyn gets one?? Really? Jackie gets one. Catherine, and a few others I don't know by just their faces yet, also got one. Annoying Ashley H, the black "southern belle" hasn't gotten one yet. Let's keep it that way!

"Wedding dress girl", Lindsay, is just a tad tipsy, shall we say. Awkward! She kind of wants a do-over on the whole dress thing and trying to kiss him.

But then there's Ashley P "Fifty Shades of Grey" has her beat. She is trashed! Look out Sean: train wreck coming your way, full steam ahead! Someone said "I'm so scared for him...someone needs to go save him." I think he gets it...he said "I brought my rape whistle just in case I need it." Haha! Oh Sean...that's why I love you! Other good Sean quotes: "She is a lot to take in!" "Fifty Shades of Grey" may have become "Fifty Shades of Drunk" tonight. And then he walks her back in the house and...she falls down. Classy lady!
Leslie "big mouth" gets a rose (ugh! why?!). Sarah gets a rose, which boosts her self-esteem. She deserved it...good for her!

Rose Ceremony:
Already have roses: 12-Tierra, AshLee, Catherine, Desiree, Robyn, Selma, Brooke, Katie, Jackie, Leslie H., Sarah, Diana
Receive roses: 7-Amanda, Lesley M., Kacie, Kristy, Daniella, Taryn, Lindsay
Going home: Ashley H., Paige, Lacey, Lauren, KeriAnn, Kelly, Ashley P.

Final words from Ashley P. She just wanted to make sure, that if she hadn't done enough to make herself look like an idiot, that after this, there would be no doubt. She proceeded to say how Sean could have f***ed her and that the next guy she sees can have her tie. And the rest was her just shaking her butt and boobs all around. Sean really dodged a bullet with that one. Whew!

Overall, there were some decent girls for Sean to choose from, I think. But...like all other Bachelor's before him, he did make some odd choices. Robyn? Leslie? Brooke? Other than "Fifty Shades of Grey", those were the absolute worst 3 of the bunch!

Looking foward to another great season! The most shocking and/dramatic ever, I'm sure :)

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