Clare and Mikey had a big fight. Mikey thinks Clare is horrible and was so vague when she said she wanted to keep things open. He took that as her wanting to take things slow, not going on a date with someone else. I don't know what his definition of "open" is, but it is obviously not the same as any other human. He is so mad at Clare that he shaved his facial hair, that he nicknamed Clare. Also, he has a ridiculously hideous tiny ponytail on the top of his head. He looks absolutely ridiculous.
Juelia continues to feel good about her date with Joe. Joe continues to hope that Sam shows up. Mikey realizes that he could be going home, so he is looking for other possibilities. He thinks that he might be a good fit for Juelia. She wanted to go for a walk and he thought she was trying to get away and he said he just wanted to kiss her. She pulled away big time...as he moves way too fast, yet again. Rejection #2 for Mikey.
Ashley I. can't imagine losing the only guy she likes to a cougar like Clare. She thinks she will use her sexuality on Jared because that's all she has.
Jared & Clare's Date
Clare thinks Jared looks like Superman. Sorry, not seeing that one.
They take a boat ride to a crane that they will be bungee jumping from. She was really nervous (big surprise), but of course, Jared was really comforting and reassuring. I would expect nothing less from him. He gave her a kiss and then they did it! ...the bungee jump :) her screaming uncontrollably the entire way and she continued screaming as they bobbed up and down.
After the date, Clare couldn't wait to tell everyone about it. Ashley I. could hear her talking and she got so upset because she didn't want to hear princess Clare talking to all her animals.
Later, Jared seems to be letting Clare down easy, He mentioned that she was 8 years older than him...but did say that she looked good. After they talked, it was pretty clear that he just didn't see a future with her, even though they had a great time, there just wasn't that feeling.
Michael Arrives
If you're keeping count, there are now 3 more guys than girls, so 3 guys will be going home.
He is hoping that Tenley is there. Imagine that! Tenley just mentioned how confused she is because she likes JJ, but she had a great time with Joshua, until she found out about his potential drug problem.
Tenley was the first one he wanted to talk to. He said to him she's "Elevenly". He told her that she was the only person he would like to go on the date with is her. She was honored and very excited to get to know him, so she accepted his date offer very quickly.
Joshua wishes diarrhea on Michael. Classy.
Michael & Tenley's Date
They find this table that is surrounded by water. They have to take their shoes off and walk through some very shallow water to get to it.
He told her that she was his Plan A, and there was no Plan B for him. He showered her with beautiful compliments.
Out of nowhere, like 100 mariachi people come and serenade them. They kiss, and now she most definitely has 3 guys who are dying to give her a rose this week. Things are probably going to get pretty ugly. I would have said that Joshua was a great fit for her, but that was before all of the partying and drug talk. Now, it seems that Michael is obviously her best choice of the 3.
Pre-Rose Ceremony
Chris says that 3 men joined them this week, and 3 would be leaving. He asked Joe if he was nervous. He said he is never over-confident. Juelia said he didn't have to worry because he knows that she is giving him her rose. Ashley S., of all people, even realizes that Joe is playing her. Mikey has one more chance to convince Juelia that Joe is not into her. Jonathan pulls her aside and asks her if there is any chance she would change her mind. He asks her if she thinks he feels the same way about her. She said she thinks he does. She doesn't want to believe him because she knows his back is against the wall and might say anything to get a rose. Mikey talked to her next and totally agreed with Jonathan. He said he hasn't been treating her well after their date. He said she has better options. She was completely blindsided by this and now she doesn't know what to do. She talked to Joe and told him what they said. He made up excuses for why he wasn't hanging around her after their date. He said it was because he didn't want to smother her after their romantic date. He kissed her and tried to prove to her what his intentions are. Yuck...makes me sick. Later, Joe is just fuming that the guys would go behind his back like that, and you know, tell her the truth! He thinks they should just stay out of his business. He said he would like to break Jonathan's jaw and beat him to a pulp until his brains were coming out his ears. If that's not enough, he said if they were in Kentucky, he would get a pair of brass knuckles and he would walk up to Mikey and knock him out. Boy, Juelia's got a real keeper there.
Mikey wants to clear the air with Joe. He wanted to explain where he was coming from. He said that he, Jonathan and Ashley S. all feel like he is politicing for Juelia's rose. He said if he can say to his face that he's not just doing it to get a rose, he would let it go. He said he wasn't just doing it to get a rose. He said, obviously he is interested in her because she is the only girl he's been talking to...not 3 or 4 like Mikey's been doing. Joe said it took all he had to not punch Mikey in his face. Mikey walked away, and under his breath, Joe said he just made him his bitch.
Joe then talked to Jonathan and said he felt like he got thrown under the bus. Jonathan said he considers him a friend and he got caught up in the situation. He said it sucks because he doesn't want to go home, and he went about things the right way. Joe said he would appreciate it if he would go and tell Juelia what he just told him. That's just great...Jonathan, you are totally right about Joe...stick with your guns! He told Juelia that never once did he actually think that Joe wasn't there for the right reasons. He said he was truly sorry and he broke down crying because he was ashamed of himself. Joe said he appreciated him making it right and they can still be friends. So now Joe is so proud of himself that he made Mikey his bitch and Jonathan his pimp. I can't wait to go to Twitter once this is all over and see what they all think now that they are seeing this play out.
So, I guess Jonathan is extremely worked up over this. We hear some crying behind a closed door. I obviously assume that it's Ashley I. or Clare, because let's face it, they are always crying. But no, it's Jonathan! Joe knocks on the door and asks if he can come in. The two dudes hug it out, as Jonathan is sobbing on his shoulder saying that that person was not him. It ended with an "I love you man". Oh my...no words.
Tenley is conflicted because she has 3 connections and likes them all in different ways. She knows that most likely 2 of these guys will be going home.
Jared is trying to figure things out. He talks with Ashley I., and somehow, above all odds, it looks like he's settled for her. It seems like he's been trying to talk himself out of liking her and looking at all of his options, but it looks like he's come back to her. He finally kissed her, and just like she always does, she totally ruined the moment. She said it was like with Kaitlyn...she had been waiting forever for him to do that.
Clare is realizing that people are coupling up and there is no one left for her. She said last year people were there to find love and that's why she is there again. She wants to feel what the people who are couples are feeling. She's making a big scene, and of course, starts crying. They are all just staring at her and everyone is just so confused.
They all gather for the ceremony and Jade asks to speak up. She said what Clare said offended her about saying that people last season were there to find love. Jade said that she's had conversations with a lot of people and they are all there for love. Tanner said Clare is just making excuses for why no guys are interested in her.
Rose Ceremony
Some of this show is really boring because there are so many people coupled and the producers obviously feel that they are just too normal to even show much of. I mean, when was the last time we heard from Jade? There's 3 couples who might as well go home and continue their relationship at this point: Jade and Tanner, Carly and Kirk, Ashley S. and Dan.
Carly -- Kirk
Ashley S. -- Dan
Jade -- Tanner
Tenley -- Joshua (aw...poor Michael)
Clare steps away and Chris follows her. She is crying because she has a rose to give and she feels no connection with anyone. Everyone knows she is just making a scene to get attention.
OH NO!!!! Stupid Bachelor in Paradise is now continuing with the totally annoying "to be continued" stuff! Come on! You know everyone is going to watch next week regardless if you keep us all hanging. Enough already...just STOP!
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